Language is not a Clown

Language is not a clown.
Starting to talk about the clown from the language is useless.
Noooot. Really?
Clown can make everything useful.
Also something that is considered useless.

It is in the usage of language – written language in this case – that lies the writing about clowning.
And in the failing of using the written language to write about clowning.
Like now.
I feel like I am failing to use written language to write about clown.
Which means I am nearing the writing about clowning.
Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing
Shut up.
I was writing about writing about clowning and how I feel the need to bend the language, to mould it, stretch it, to make a space in language for me to write about clowning.
What does it mean to bend the language?
Like so.
And mould?
Like that.
Stretch?
Easy.
All done in some publishing software.

Continue.

Clowning is physical state in which I can make everything useful, everything is valid enough to be used for creating a clowning space.
At least that is what I think now, 9th October 2020 at around 11:45 when writing a text about clowning that I will share with Tina and Gergely in about 40min.

How to use written language to write about the clowning?
By clowning the written language.
Like this.
Like many texts next to this one.
And most probably I am failing at clowning the written language to use it to write about the clowning.
Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing
Shut up.

Repetition consoles, makes us feel like we know what we are doing since you are happy you found a pattern, a quite stupid one, like me writing for the second time in this text “Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing
Shut up.”
And now I used it for the third time.
I am sure you, the reader, feel better now, since you noticed that I am repeating something, that maybe there is a direction in this text and that it is probably about writing about clowning.

Too much repetion is annoying unless in clowning state you notice that you are repeating something and make use of it.
To be loved, funny, poetic.
Aha, another repetion, another quote from before.
And again.
Well, too much repetition might make the reader think that the writer is being cynical and hold reader stupid for not being able to do anything else but notice the sentences being repeated.
This can also be turned into a clowning tool.
Only if the person in clowning states, notices it.
And actually if that person does not notice it, is not in the clowning state.
It is failing.
And that can propel that person deep into the clowning state.
Quite an endeavor.

See, by failing to write about clowning and failing at being structred at writting in the way we are used for written texts to be structured, I am tumbling into clowning state right now.
Nooooot. Really?
For me I am in more playful state writing this text then before when I started to write about it, and not really in the clowning state.
Seems like I know how is to be in the clowning state when writing about clowning state, seems like I know how to clown the writing about the clowning.
It just seems.
I have no idea, no experience of it.
I am having an experience right now and using my (to me) poor skills of writing to clown the writing and fall into a clowning state of writing about clowning state, and wondering if this state that I am in a clowning state when writing.
I am not a clown writing this text, still it seems I am entering the clowning state that is a space where my clown(s) reside(s).

If I repeat now again “Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing
Shut up.” I think I encoutered another big juicy flop.
I just did it and I feel I am in deep shit.
Without editing the above written text (I cross my finger I did not edit it, that I left it as is with all its gramatical, logical, illogical mistakes and failures as text as writing as writing about clown) I am making my best to be loved, funny, poetic.
And by this I just might get myself out of shit I put myself in by repeating “Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing«
Shut up.”
And again.
The wise guy in me hears the voice of Beckett saying: “Fail better”.
Beckett’s texts are ultimately not a clowning text.
They were never aimed to be such.
Or so I think.
Gotcha, I got myself out of deepest shit into less shit.
Just to catch a breath.

And this is how one can write about writing about clowning that is not yet a clown.
And this is how we can see how the way I am making clown is also influenced by usage of language for clowning.
It’s a mess.
It’s repeating.
Is it funny, poetic?

Do you love me?

PS »”Ing ing ing Ling aaaaaaaa lingaaaaaa Liiiiiiiiiiing. Shut up.« is inspired by a clowness Linga Ling

Written by Simeon Huzun, 9th October 2020

Leave a Reply

Scroll UpScroll Up